Hiraeth » essays

Hollol wallgo

Paul — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 08:39:49 +0000

So my first essay is submitted and my brain happily did not explode, although it was touch and go at times. In this electronic age, we had to submit it in two ways. First, online to a program which checks for plagiarism. This was a dramatic process with various dire warnings appearing at stages but I finally was issued with an e-receipt. The second submission was to drop a paper copy into an oversized post-box, which left me with a real sense of anti-climax. However, a few days later a Hogworts owl had delivered a paper receipt into my owl-hole, sorry – pigeon hole.

Finally, I have entered real student life and went out drinking with the gang after a late lecture which finished at 6pm. Actually, we went to Wetherspoons for curry night and several of us left at 9.30.

Neil Messerschmidt Mortiboys (don't ask)

Neil and Father Josh, however, upheld good student tradition and finally collapsed, tired and emotional, into bed at 4.30. Again, 21st century technology helps us and the photographs that appeared the next day on Facebook told an interesting if somewhat disturbing story.

Over the weekend I was congratulating myself and feeling I was in control of my life again. By Monday I was cruelly disabused of that illusion when I realised I had to submit a fully referenced bibliography the following day for an essay for which I had not even chosen a title.

I’m now back to rapid cycling between happiness, panic, optimism, despair, bewilderment, confidence, exhaustion, denial and deep satisfaction. It’s sort of bipolar disease on speed. Apparently that’s normal student life for those who aren’t normally stoned/drunk/hung-over and can’t feel pain anyway!

Father Josh (note book on Catholic priesthood and Bible)

Oh, and ‘hollol wallgo’? It’s my Welsh phrase of the week. It means ‘completely bonkers’. It’s the phrase that most readily comes to mind when I think of ~~Gary~~ Gareth, Father Josh and Neil. Fortunately, the other three members of the gang of seven (Jo, Jen and Rhonwen) maintain nature’s balance of sanity. I make no statement where I am.

Breaking through the pain barrier

Paul — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 17:39:36 +0000

I hit a low point earlier this week and was drowning in a sea of seminars, lectures, workshops bibliographies, timetables, lack of parking spaces and general state of being dazed and bewildered. I even made a plea for reassurance on my Facebook status that I’ll get to grips with these things some time before I graduate. Immediately a number of friends came back with that reassurance. Here’s a couple of quotes:

Rob Merchant said, You’ll be fine. It takes students the first 3-4 weeks to get into the swing of things. By Christmas you’ll feel like an old hand, and by your second year you’ll be wondering what all the fuss was about.

Jane Templeman said, I remember that feeling. I just kept thinking that if they left me alone for just a while I could actually finish a task but instead all these things appeared on my timetable!

It seems to me to be part of a strategy for helping youngsters into university life in the first year. For most, if they do not have something organised then they do not do anything, so the answer is schedule loads of stuff, knowing they will cut stuff and not read everything: a shot gun approach. However the older students are far more committed, want to learn as much as possible and so expect themselves to do everything thoroughly, making overload a real danger.

I think the skill is not to take it all too seriously. Missing the odd thing is not fatal at this stage, you can always borrow notes. However tiredness is the enemy to be guarded against because with it quickly comes unrealistic discouragement.

Wise words and really helpful to me. One of my anxieties was related to being an older mature student, living off campus and the possibility of not having any sense of being part of university life. The reality is happily very different. I’ve become part of a group, most of whom are mature students living off-campus like me, but all in their 20s. Next week four of us are getting together to plan our first major essay.

I suppose I’ve only done two weeks in my degree so feeling better this weekend is definitely progress!